Giving Birth

Giving birth is probably the most amazing experience we undergo as women. How much cooler does it get than bringing another human being into this world? I've thought about my ideal birthing experience countless times since I got pregnant the first time, and although it was incredible seeing my daughter for the very first time, I would not categorize my first labor and delivery experience as "ideal". It may have been for the harsh lecture we got from the midwife upon arrival to the hospital which turned things sour. Or perhaps it was the way that, even though I wanted a natural birth, I ended up with every intervention imaginable, from the pitocin drip to being hooked up to the fetal monitor to the midwife breaking my water, to the epidural that had to be administered twice that made it less than perfect. Granted, I had already decided to surrender myself to the interventions so that the day would go smoothly and Bella would be born into a calm and peaceful environment, but that idea quickly went to pot when the midwife woudn't stop interrogating us about why we had taken so long to arrive. The icing on the cake was when the midwife sent Alex to collect the crib and eat some breakfast, then 10 minutes later told me the baby was coming RIGHT THEN and that we needed to call him YA!. Um... Yeah... Remembering phone numbers and speaking Spanish were the last thing on my mind. Since we couldn't contact Alex, the midwife took to criticizing him. She couldn't imagine where he could possibly be. So then, instead of focusing on what was happening (I was minutes away from giving birth!), all I could think was, "Alex, you're going to miss this!" and "Shut up you old hag!" Luckily he came just in time, and beautiful, conehead Bella was born. All the arguments and unpleasantness melted away as we watched the delivery team wash her and weigh her and test her. They didn't really let me hold her until we were back in our room and even then the nurse tried to make me wait for another half an hour while her body heated up with the help of a hot water bottle. (The second the nurse left, we grabbed her and held her close, and hardly ever put her back in her crib again!)

This time around, I have decided not to leave myself to the mercy of the doctors. I've wanted a natural birth since I first got pregnant, and darnit! that's what I'm going to get. Unfortunately, it's not easy to get that here. The only birthing center is about an hour away and it's ridiculously expensive if your private insurance doesn't cover it (which mine didn't). Hospitals are just learning the protocols on how to let women birth naturally, so most of the time you'll end up sitting hooked up to a fetal monitor with midwives and nurses walking in and out of your room constantly. So, we've opted for a homebirth, which, by the way, is not something you talk about freely here. Most young to middle aged people have no idea about birthing and think that it is an illness - something that needs to be medically monitored or else all hell breaks loose. I've done massive research on the subject and know that's not true, and that, according to a study published in the Canadian Medical Journal in September 2009, homebirths are just as safe, if not safer than hospital births. This isn't the only study you'll find that supports this statement. If you start looking into it, you'll be overwhelmed with all the information you can find. I am so facinated by the entire subject, and think that if I were to choose a new career for myself, I'd be a midwife (but I'd probably only work in birthing centers, just for the stability of it all).Of course there are always those freak incidences where all hell does break loose, which is why I'm happy to have found two highly trained midwives, Teresa and Sandra, who will be attending the birth, and we, of course, have our back-up emergency plan. These two women are AMAZING! It was the first time I had sat down and talked to two professionals about birthing and felt completely understood and supported and most importantly - relaxed. It was such a different feeling than with my OBGYN who told me I had to quit breastfeeding to get pregnant and then two months later when I was still breastfeeding and pregnant didn't believe me and actually said something to the effect of, "well, WE'LL SEE if this baby makes it" (like breastfeeding was putting my baby at risk). AAAARGH!!!

I am ecstatic that I'm going to get the birthing experience that I've been hoping for. I am reading "Hypnobirthing" at the moment and trying to remember all the advice I got from watching "The Business of Being Born" and from reading the amazing Ina May Gaskin who is basically the guru of birthing, in my opinion. I'm down to 4-6 weeks left before this little baby makes her appearance. I'm still freakin' out , but I'm also so anxious to meet her! Think good thoughts for us. I have no doubt that things will go well, but receiving a little extra love never hurt anyone! ;-)