Would a Rose by any Other Name Smell as Sweet?

It's now time to start the name game - the process of finding that perfect name for your little baby, the name you absolutely adore, only to have your husband toss it out like old stinky cheese, simply because he once knew a girl with that same name who, unfortunately, was a filthy tramp. Aaagh! Deflated.

Luckily, "Arabella" isn't a common name that carries a lot of baggage.

Isn't it funny how names are so much more than just a few letters put together to make a pretty sound? They usually come with personalities attached to them, and those personalities are different for each person. Take the name "Stephanie", for example. I could never give my daughter that name because of the little second grade Stephanie with the messy hair who always tucked her skirt into her tights, and went around like that all day long. I don't think she was very nice either, come to think of it. Now on the other hand, Alex might have known the sweetest girl alive named Stephanie, but there's no way in hell he'd ever get that name past me. In my mind, she'll always be that unkept little girl climbing around on chairs showing her underwear to the world.

What happens when parents finally get through all the back and forth of finally settling on a name? Why, you want to tell the world, of course. HOORAY! you've finally found that perfect name for this perfect little person that you will soon meet on that perfect day in the not-so-distant future. So you eagerly tell your mother-in-law only to find her reaction less than enthusiastic. What? There's a girl on a soap opera you watch with that exact same name, and she's overbearing, dishonest and to put it bluntly, a real bitch?! Fantastic. Thinking you'll get a better reaction from someone else, you tell a close friend and you get the telling pause and then "Oh... that's different." or "nice" or, even worse, "huh." - no reaction at all.

What are we looking for when we share the baby's name with our friends and family? We are looking for them to be overjoyed and amazed by the beauty, just like we are. We want them to say things like "Wow! That's the most beautiful name I've ever heard!" or " I LOVE IT!", but of course, as I said before, we all attribute certain qualities to a name, and have no control over our reaction to it. Unfortunately, due to these unsought after reactions, we start doubting the brilliance of the name, and sometimes the name loses it's shiny glow and becomes a cold lump of poo. Undesirable -just like Stephanie.We were lucky that most people adored the name "Arabella", but there were a few people who waited to tell us that they didn't really like it until AFTER she was born.

That is why, my loved ones, despite my overflowing excitement to share this name that we love so much, we are going to wait to surprise you all with this perfect name until our perfect little angel is born. I will give you a few hints, just because I love games so much:

The name is just as beautiful as "Arabella" and just as unusual.
It's Spanish but has its English and French equivalents.
It also ends in 'a'
There's one more clue in this post, but I won't tell you what it is!

So, have fun, and enjoy the wait! I actually love it when couples decided to wait to announce the name because it adds an element of surprise to the birth. We've taken out the gender surprise, so now we have the name surprise! I hope you all feel the same way.

Love, Sarah

Surprise Surprise!

It's a girl!

I'm still in shock, but ecstatic!! Sisters. This is going to be so much fun!!!

Place Your Bets

19 weeks with a little bump.

All right folks, so the time has FINALLY come to find out if we're having a boy of a girl. This Thursday at 11:00 am I'll be 20 weeks pregnant and looking at our new little bundle LIVE! For those of you who still keep up with my blog, I thought it would be fun to see what your predictions are, and then we can see who was right and I'll be able to keep this forever and eva!

I'm thinking it's a boy for these reasons:

• This time I had morning sickness, and with Bella NADA.
• This time my face is breaking out NON-STOP and with Bella it cleared up.
• This time my ass is half the size it was with Bella at 20 weeks and I've hardly gained any weight.

I guess that's it. Basically this pregnancy is different, so I just think boy. What are your guesses??

Before I was a Mom

Looking back at my pre-mommy self, I find some parts hard to recognize. I have done so many things differently than I thought I would. I suppose I was quite ignorant about being a parent before becoming one, at least about all tricky bits like how hard bedtime can be and that teething and colds can turn your sweet little angel child into a relentless terror and that when a child is willful, your way may not always be the ONLY way. I remember looking at some parenting techniques and thinking "Jeez! That's crazy. I'd NEVER do that." I imagined myself stricter and sterner than I'm turning out to be. I imagined I'd be tougher. I imagined my children would all turn out to be little saints. Isn't that a laugh?!

Bella giving me kisses

I remember when I was at Tammy's pre-wedding party, pregnant and chatting with the girls, I said something really negative and snotty about co-sleeping, about how I wouldn't be caught dead with my baby in my bed. Two years later, I can't imagine not sleeping with Bella, and am aching inside at the prospect of moving her into her own bed. It has been such a bonding experience for us. Sometimes in the middle of the night, she wakes up and makes a "mmmmmm" sound and puckers her lips - the cue for me to give her a kiss. She also loves to rub my arms and sometimes she hugs them. When she wakes up she is always so happy, she gets up and brings me my shoes and tries to put them on my feet, which immediately gives me the energy I need to get out of bed.

Bella running around at the airport without pants on (she threw up on her dress and we had packed all her clothes)

It's amazing just how much being a mother has changed me. It's changed the way I look at life. It's certainly changed my emotional breakdown threshold (I seem to cry at everything these days). Most importantly, though, it's changed the way I think. I used to see things in black and white. If I didn't understand something, I'd write it off as "strange" or "crazy" and sometimes even "wrong". Take, for example, my initial judgment of Waldorf education... When I was teaching kindergarten In Pacific Grove, Ca, we shared our campus with a Waldorf school. I thought they were a bunch of wackos who irresponsibly let the children play all day long in an unstructured environment, and wouldn't allow them to read until they were in the second grade. It just seemed wrong and against everything that I'd been taught. It wasn't until I started looking into natural toys as an alternative to all the plastic crap that breaks in two seconds these days, that I came across Waldorf again, and this time I fell in love with certain facets of the philosophy.

In a small village in Mallorca for our anniversary.

Now after changing my opinion about so many aspects of parenting and child rearing, I no longer see things so clearly. I have, however, dedicated myself to learning as much as possible during this lifetime. When I don't understand why someone chooses a certain strategy which seems weird to me, I try to learn more about it. Maybe I won't choose the same things, but at least I will understand the reasoning behind them and I'll be able to accept most things without having to label them as "right" and "wrong".

I think that's what they call "tolerance", isn't it? Boy, I really feel like I'm growing. ;-)