Advice about Advice??

I know, I know. I've been M.I.A. for the past month. I apologize if I've made you lose faith in my blog-writing predictability. I will promise to make once-a-week blog-writing one of my New Year's Resolutions. I do have good excuses... most of them attributed to our little angel. Bella decided it was time to start waking up numerous times throughout the night - just in time for our trip to The States. Fantastic. We were looking forward to a few nights out, but it doesn't look like that's going to happen. Oh well. I suppose that's what parenthood is about. We'll make do (and save money too!)
What else has happened this past month??? Hmm... Bella has started pulling herself up and getting in to everything. She doesn't think she needs to hold on with two hands (or even one hand occasionally) and that makes for some pretty nasty bumps on the noggin.

What I've learned this past month

I suppose I mainly spent my month learning a lot about being a mom. The most important thing I've learned is that parenthood can be extremely difficult and sometimes you just need to talk to someone who can listen, and listen well. I found myself completely desperate and in tears after a week of struggling to get her to fall asleep, only to have her wake up 20 minutes later. I'm seriously lacking support here, and it meant a lot to me to have my friends and family back home encouraging me and telling me, "you're doing just fine. Trust yourself. This is temporary. We're here for you."
I think one of the hardest things about being a new parent (besides learning to type with one hand) is the moment when things start going hay-wire and your parenting philosophy is put to the test. Alex and I have decided that we don't want to use the Ferber method of letting your baby "cry it out". I know it's probably the most common thing to do, and I have no problem with other people doing it, but we choose to use other methods instead. Of course, the Ferber method is the easiest thing to do because it gets the job done quickly. But, after reading "The No Cry Sleep Solution" by Elizabeth Pantley, we're trying a step-by-step approach that requires an ENORMOUS amount of effort and energy from us at the moment, but in the end, we hope we accomplish a sounder sleep without too much undue stress. I bring this up because I have about a bizzilion friends who are pregnant at the moment with baby #1 and I wanted to share something I've learned:

If you feel strongly about something, stick to your guns. Follow your intuition. There will always be someone, a friend even, who will tell you that what you are doing is "wrong." Hailey said it best when she said, "there is no RIGHT way in parenting. " It's good to be open to helpful ideas and some moms are really good about sharing ideas, but avoiding unsolicited advice. Most people appreciate helpful ideas that start like, "Have you tried.." or, "I did... when Jebediah was just a lad" It's much nicer than hearing, "You need to..." or "Why are you doing that" or, "What THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?!!" (Ok, no one has ever used that last remark, but sometimes tone of voice and expression speak louder than words.)I've learned that parenting isn't easy, and instead of judging each other and making snide comments about how So and So is undoubtedly screwing up his kids beyond repair, we should be supporting each other. Even if we don't choose the same techniques or follow the same philosophy, we all need someone who will be there just to listen and say, "you're doing just fine...." or "Have you tried..." That's one helpful idea my friend, Esther, gave me (and she's usually full of good ideas).

The last thing I've learned is that after a terribly long week of failing miserably what you really need is someone to say to you, "Go have some time for yourself. I'll watch the baby for a couple hours." AAAAHHH! Heaven.

Halloween

Halloween night. Hippies and vampires roam the streets in unity, kids stay up extra late due to excessive sugar intake, adults welcome the excuse to dress up and act silly, black cats and witches come out to play...

and so do new moms of seven month-old baby girls!

I was worried the entire week beforehand because Bella typically wakes up around midnight every night and will only go back to bed with a midnight snack from mommy. If she doesn't get what she wants, she gets ANGRY. All went well, though. Los Ya Yos (The Grandparents) did us a huge favor and came over to stay with Bella while I went out to the biggest party in town: the annual Halloween party at The Bohemian.

Alex, Bella and I spent the day at The Bohemian decorating and preparing for our big night with the help from friend and fellow bartender, Veronica and her boyfriend, Iñaki. It takes AGES, but it's always worth it in the end. We get more and more customers dressed up in costume each year, and this year, they happened to do quite a bit of drinken'.
Alex grew his facial hair for an entire month and a half to be an old western bar man. He looked fantastic and made a killer Sweet Blood cocktail.

I went as a dark angel, complete with black feathered wings, and did some socializing with Amy Winehouse and a scary-looking clown that was really good on the inside.

Veronica went as the Corpse Bride in a costume she and her mother made from scratch. (p.s that's not her real hair)

At around 3 am, I hung up my wings, and picked up my baby girl who had slept peacefully until 2:30 am when Paquita gave her a bottle and changed her. We were happy to see each other, and relieved to know that we can survive a night apart from each other.

Alex and Veronica kept on mixing until around 5am when they put away their Boston shakers and closed the doors on another successful Halloween night at The Bohemian.

Adventures in Body Parts with the Polo Bunches

My right hand was hurting a few days ago. It was sore from clutching the NEW CAMERA we finally bought after saving for these past few months! It's amazing. I'm, by far, no expert so have enlisted myself in a self-taught crash course in photography 101, which, in a nutshell is me messing with all the manual settings and taking a load of pictures until I eventually get one or two that are decent enough to keep. Alex is much more knowledgeable. He's taken photography courses and knows all about aperture, speed, lighting... blah blah blah. He tries to give me quick mini lessons when he has a free minute, but that doesn't happen too often. I'm loving it, though, despite the hundreds of recycle bin bound shots and the hand and finger pain.

Ari is no longer the only mischevious little rascal. Bella has been promoted.

Besides my snap-happy fingers, other body parts in our family have noteworthy news. Arabella's legs (but mostly arms) have been working full-force this week. She has reached what some may refer to as the "crawling" stage. I see it more as "slithering." She's still not got the strength to be up on her knees, but that hasn't stopped her. She's already all over the place, and it's totally freakin' me out. I got up early this morning and "baby-proofed" the living room. Basically, I just rearranged the furniture so I could place our heater safely behind the liquor cabinet (so if it ever gets too chaotic, I'll have a warm, safe haven to drown out my sorrows. Just kidding!) and moved all the electronics back so she can't get her little fingers on all the buttons. She's obsessed with the computer mouse and seems to be gravitationally drawn to every cable in sight.

Alex's fingers also deserve honorable mention, particularly his ring finger. Last Saturday, after a busy night at The Bohemian, Alex was washing a glass that had been the happy home to the famous "Bohemian Cocktail" when it suddenly shattered in his hand. When he finally got home, several hours and three stitches later, he had a woeful story to tell me and an appointment for a tetanus booster shot. FUN TIMES!

Like a dutiful, snap-happy student, I didn't miss this opportunity

Lastly, this week's bodily adventures would not be complete if we failed to mention Bella's poor little gums. Just this morning I felt the ridges of her first tooth! It must have poked through last night. It's about time. I swear to god, she's been teething for the past four months. There's one more little bump where her next tooth should be pushing through within the next few days (I hope). I'm counting on that, at least, for some well-deserved relief, and maybe, if we're lucky, some longer sleep stretches!